When in Rome

Owh how I loved Rome, it was such an exceptionally beautiful city and we went at the best time of year for me anyway. Why? Well it was in the 30's and I was in my element with the heat, anyone that know's me know's I get cold easily and just love the sun.

Most of my Rome wardrobe consisted of shorts and strappy tops, wearing anything more would have been too hot, not that I would ever complain about that. I promise I am not sponsored by H&M, but their range this year is amazing. I don't think I have any denim clothing by anyone else, purely because of the fit and it's so soft!

I always love visiting the historical sites anywhere I go, just imagining that you are stepping where many have gone before. The many years it has stood the test of time, is just incredible really. As a structural engineer, I always find it fascinating that they managed to create such a structure without the technology we have today.

When we went to see the Trevi Fountain and Colosseum itself I wore a pretty floral top, again from H&M. It really made my tan stand out and clings to all the right parts of your body. Unfortunately, I didn't manage to get all of my outfit's pictured.. boohoo. Those will have to be taken at a later date and featured in a separate post I guess.

Shorts: H&M
Shoes: TU Clothing
Bag: Olympus 
Black Top: River Island
Floral Top: H&M

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

Dumping Emotional Baggage and Learning To Let Go

We are all no stranger to emotional baggage, anyone that says they haven't got scars from their past is just lying. Everyone has had some form or hurt, heartache, grief or suffering in their lifetime; it's just all slightly different.

I am certainly one of those and am on a long ass journey to unpacking that baggage, the problem we have is that depending on how long or hard that damage was, the more time you will take to heal. Being one of the people that bottle things up until they explode, I know just how detrimental these actions can be to our well-being and mental state. So learning to talk more when I have an issue is something that has become very apparent.

Why? It can be very easy to pretend that your baggage doesn't exist, to hide it away. Life becomes much easier if we lock it away in a secret little corner of our minds, the thing is much like physical clutter and baggage. Things start to spill over and fall out, revealing themselves every now and again. For me, I have found that since speaking to my close family and friends I have started to feel lighter and better in myself. It's true that, yes your problems won't all be solved, however, not letting everything pile up and keeping it to yourself, does truly help.

Everyone is different and their baggage will stem from so many different events, most of them being from childhood, yes I know that is a cliche but it is true. So it would stand to reason that you will have been holding onto this for a very long time, letting it define and shape you, without even knowing it. Facing it, unloading and moving on are three very important steps that need to be taken and done with support. Currently, I am only at the First Stage, having only just realised that I am in a place where I need help and need to face my demons.

That's not to say I actually know what those demons are, the thing is, you could very well go in with your eyes open thinking you are feeling one way because of one thing. Only to find that it is all to do with another. After speaking to a few friends I have come to realise that I actually have NO memories of my childhood, literally nothing from a baby to a few years back. Zip.. Nothing, which is actually quite disturbing when you think about it. I only know what people tell me, and even then, how do I know if it's true?

If unlike me you can actually remember things and can start your journey to let go, possibly with or without the help of a counselor then perhaps you might want to look at the following aspects to help you move on.

Are you holding onto any Guilt? Is there anything in your past that you are holding onto because you're ashamed or feeling guilty about? Is there actually anything you can do about it? If there is then make it right as best you can, then forgive yourself. If not, ask yourself this. Is there a time machine?

NO. Will you do it again? Will you take the lessons you learned to make better choices next time? Okay, well forgive yourself. There is no point in basically giving yourself a self-grudge.

Another big thing to consider is if you're holding onto any longstanding grudges? I know better than anyone how hurt and just outright raged I have been due to the actions of others, it is/ has been completely incomprehensible to even consider forgiving let alone forgetting. Yes, you may very well be 100% completely justified in feeling how you do, but it's never going to get you the apology you're looking for or the validation.

Just think about how long you have held these feeling for, if the other person/s didn't own up or agree back then, what's going to change now? Nothing, so why not just lighten your load by moving on. Forgive and forget, believe you me I know it is far easier said than done, especially when they randomly pop up or something. Trust me though, it will be much easier to move on and walk past if you have learned to just drop it.

Finally Fear. Although this is something that should be fairly normal to us, it can also be fairly detrimental if it becomes out of hand. Again this is something that I know all too well, having been in a fairly emotionally abusive relationship in the past, it has taken me a very long time to not be scared of ever bumping into him.

Even last year, I thought he had found out where I live now. It took me about 10 cigarettes and 2 long walks with the dog to calm me down. Needless to say, he either doesn't know or hasn't come back. At the end of the day, what can I actually do about it? Not much, other than not answer or ask him to leave. So I have learned to keep calm and not be fearful of him, he can't do anything to me now, so why let whoever or whatever have that hold over you?

Hopefully, this post will help you to take a look at where you're at and seek help if you truly need it.

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

How To Get Paid For Posts*

Having been writing and posting blogs for a few years now, I would say that I understand the frustration of fellow bloggers. Trying to get yourself out there and work with brands can be very difficult.

More so nowadays, it certainly has become more difficult to collaborate, however, there are blogger outreach services for paid blogging opportunities as well as free product collaborations. You just have to put yourself out there and look for them.

There are certain things that you should always remember though, being a blogger does not entitle you to always expect to get paid, sometimes just receiving a free product for review should be enough. Especially for a growing blogger. Never the less, it is important to understand that the time you put into your writing and work is worth something too. It's all about balancing expectation with you and the PR representatives.

In order to actually get noticed and be eligible for work, you need to be an active and attractive blogger. By that I do not mean physically attractive, that would just be subjective and plain discrimination in my opinion, but your actual blogs set up and look. I will run through a few things you can do to get the right kind of attention.

Own Your Name

Most PR companies and brands these days, prefer to work with bloggers that actually own their own domain. Take mine for instance, when I first started out my URL was www.romanovsviews.blogspot.com but now I have bought the right's to my domain name so even if you type in that address it takes you to my current blog address www.romanovsviews.com It just looks more professional and shows them how serious you are about your blog. 

Be Clear

Either have a clear Homepage or an About Me page which clearly identifies who you are and what your blog is all about. It will give brands a sense of who you are and why they should work with you. Just having a blog with posts and no structure or biography is confusing to the everyday reader let alone a potential collaborator. 

You should also always be clear that certain posts are ads or collaborations, I use an asterisk and refer to my disclaimer. Readers do not want to be constantly guessing whether or not you have bought something or promoting it because you have been paid or gifted it. Take this post, for example, I have clearly stated it is sponsored and titled the post with an asterisk, as indicated in my disclaimer. 

Templates are Everything

Choose or create a template/ layout that works for you but can also be read and navigated easily by your readers. It should be clear, crisp and appealing to the eye. There are a lot of templates on Etsy etc. that you can purchase already made, ready for you to modify to your liking. 

Even getting your blog's name made into a logo and putting that in the layout can really make it all stand out. 

Links

Link your social media accounts. Not only should you link your accounts with little icons, but get sliders and windows where your readers can see what you have been posting. It may even generate new traffic to those accounts. 

Commenting on other blogs and leaving your blog address is a great way to get your name out there, not only that but it's a great way to actually interact with other bloggers. 

Post Often

Finally, you need to stay in contact with your readers. Post regularly, with captivating content. Use your own images, get creative, get personal and ask questions for your readers to answer. Showing that you are a regular active blogger is a very positive sign to brands, you wouldn't want to work with someone that posted once in a blue moon, would you? 

* This is a sponsored post. Please see my Disclaimer for more information.

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

A Positive Outlook On Dating*

Dating, Dating, Dating, that's all people seem to ask me about when they haven't seen me for a while. Are you with anyone? Have you found Mr. Right? To be honest, it is kind of hard for me to find a positive outlook on dating, mainly because I haven't had to best experiences.

I am sure I am not alone in that, seeming to always find the wrong sorts of people or just generally attract them too. That doesn't mean that every single dating experience has to be a bad one though.
It's all about having the right mindset, outlook, and expectations. These days, with social media and reality TV shows, our expectations can be set a little too high. Nobody in real life looks like a model, acts like a prince or has the bank account the size of a football player. Give respect and get respect back, treat people as you want to be treated, simple as that.

For me, I have found the best kind of dates are ones you least expect to work out, ones that start out a little shy or awkward. For instance meeting up to take the dog out for a walk, which is always a worry for me nowadays considering how reactive she can be with other dogs. It can be embarrassing, to say the least, but then by the end of it, you are talking away like you have known each other for a long time. Joking and playing, in a 'bantery' kind of way. Leaving each other, making plans to meet again.

I suppose that only works if you have actually found someone to go out on a date with, free dating sites can be one way to find that or another is to just get out there. Recently I went out, just to get out of the house and hang out with a friend and ended up being asked out on a date. Never the less he wasn't really the type I would date but had I have not gone out, I wouldn't have opened myself up to new people and opportunities. 

Other than finding a partner I have actually found that through dating I have found at least one good friend. A few years back, having tried a dating site and speaking to this guy for about a year, we decided to meet. Needless to say, it didn't work out as a relationship, however, we have stayed in contact and been friends ever since. Meeting and catching up whenever we can. For that I am grateful, sure some guys find it weird, but they just have to get over it. I prefer guy friends over girls anyway, they cause and come with less drama. 

So I suppose my dating history can't be all that bad, you just have to find the needle in the haystack. Hopefully you too can find some positives to dating going forward, if you haven't done so already. I would love to hear about it. 

* This is a sponsored post in collaboration with Match Me Happy. Please see my Disclaimer for more information.

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

Why I'm Not Worried About Following 'The Norm'

Normal, what is normal anyway? Who or what constitutes normal? I suppose society these days has us thinking that we should be one way, we should have our life set out a certain way. For someone my age, it is not 'normal' for them to be single with no children. Our society has made us into sheep that need to follow certain guidelines, otherwise, we are unhappy...

The thing is the only person that can make you happy or unhappy is yourself. We set out what our life should or shouldn't look like, and whilst I did have a life plan when I was very young, it wasn't a realistic one. It was what society had drilled into me, marriage, house then kids before the age of 30, all whilst trying to build a good career for myself. 

Life works in mysterious ways, yes I am 28 and single, renting a house with a dog. Is it perfect no, but who can actually say that their life is? Who can say that their life is going to plan, just as they wanted? I am guessing not many if anyone. 

I have never been what I would call normal, having a nutty and hyper personality. That being said, I am sure new people that meet me these days would have a different opinion, of shy or anxious, but then that's down to my current mental state. 

There is no point in settling for something that may be right for the time being or is going to give you what you want at that certain time. It's just doing it because you feel you have too, not because you actually want too. Once you've made your bed, you normally have to lay in it, remember that!

We as a population are fairly good at following each other and becoming sheep, jumping on the nearest bandwagon to get the latest craze or be in the with the 'crowd'. I for one am not happy being a sheep, I don't know about you, but that just isn't me. That's not to say that if you genuinely like something you shouldn't go for it, but my issue is about continually following the latest trends or social conducts.

I think right now I have resigned myself to the fact that I am likely to not have kids, possibly not get married and so long as I have Harley, I am ok with that. For me what is important is getting my head sorted out. Finding out who around me is actually a friend and so far I am surprised to find that one person I genuinely thought I could count on, has not been here.

I suppose what I am saying is that no one can define you or what is the 'Norm', you have to find that for yourself. You need to get to where you want to be and be happy doing it, if you're not, then find out why and change it!

Kimono: Select
Jeans: H&M
Trainers: Ugg
Bag: Olympus 
Shirt: Lipsy
Belt: Primark

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

June Lookback 2018

Now I know this is a little late, but I did warn you in last months Lookback that it would be. Why? Well, I am just back from Rome and it was fantastic!!!

Social

This month started out a little slow, to be honest, the main emphasis has got to be my Rome trip, but I will get on to that and do separate posts!

I did see Derren Brown this month, and his shows are always amazing to watch, he is captivating and very true with his words. We forget that we are individual, all have our flaws and should embrace them rather than getting bogged down with what we think is perfection. We should try to please our selves and not focus so much on everyone around us, there is nothing wrong with being selfish. We all need it from time to time.

I have also done a few Agility demo days, with a couple more coming up in July. These days are always fun, with such genuine people that really support each other. Harley absolutely loves it, plus its great practice for me and her.

Rome

Well, what can I say, Rome was amazing! The whole city is just spectacular and is genuinely one you need to have on your list to see. Not to mention the weather, getting up to 33-degree heat, I was certainly in my element.

I would definitely like to go back because I don't think we got to see everything Rome had to offer. Pompee is a place I would like to visit and I know I didn't get to sample all of the gluten-free food that I heard so much about! Keep an eye out for a few posts where I will be giving you all the details from my Rome trip, including a couple of the outfits I wore.

Blog

Romanovs Views really spiked with a lot of PR this month, mainly for Father's Day. I got to work with a few new brands, which is always exciting. One of which is actually a fellow Instagrammer that I had been following and interacting with for a while, so to have been offered the chance to work with her was a real pleasure, check her out - Dayzee.

Alongside the PR posts, I have been able to focus a little more on some Fashion and Lifestyle posts. Hopefully taking Romanovs Views in a direction that many of you will enjoy and will continue to follow. I am always looking for feedback or post ideas, so if you have any please give me a shout.

Health

This is a pretty sensitive subject for me right now. Whilst my body health may be kind of okay and settled, for now, my mental health has taken somewhat of a hit. It is something that has been bubbling for a long time now, which has finally come to the surface, with an outburst to some close family members.

We all struggle from time to time, others more than most and mental health/ depression is something that is still not understood properly. Even I don't understand it and the implications of not talking. That is why I am seeking help and once I know more, have a better handle on it and have started to heal, I think then I will be able to speak about it more openly. For now just be patient, when I have bad days, I am sorry, just know it is not aimed at you. It just is one of those things.

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

The Olympus Pen Shoulder Camera Bag

Now that I am getting more and more into photography and have my Olympus Pen E-PL8, with various lenses I decided it was about time I invested in a decent camera bag. When I saw that Olympus had released a bag that crossed fashion with necessity, well I knew I had to see what all the fuss was about.

The Olympus Shoulder bag is 100% genuine leather and comes in two versatile colours, Just Nude and Black Like My Dress. To match with my Camera I had to get the Nude shade and I am in absolute love! These bags retail for £79.99, which is fairly pricey for any bag, however, remember it is leather.

The strap is detachable too, meaning it can double as a camera strap when you're not using the bag. I do quite like that concept, as you're able to get multiple uses out of your purchase and dress up your camera at the same time.

Inside the bag, you have two removable pads with some velcro lining, which allows you to move them to accommodate whatever you wish to fit in. On their website, it claims that you can fit in your camera, 1 lens and a smartphone. I, as you can see, have managed to fit in my camera, 2 lenses, my phone and still have a little room for something else.

I suppose it all depends on how you pack it and what you want to want. When I took the plunge to purchase this bag, I was going away to Rome, so wanted to fit in everything. On a normal day out, I cannot imagine needing all 3 lenses.

So match Fashion with high-performance accommodation and keep your camera and style safe.

Kimono: Select
Jeans: H&M
Bag: Olympus 
Shirt: Lipsy

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.